I have learned more in these last few months working with you than I did in years of therapy. - S.S., Colorado
Scientist, Writer, Educator & Suicide Bereavement Specialist
AFTER A SUCCESSFUL CAREER as a scientist and award-winning writer, I decided to commit myself to a new path as a healthcare professional. I had been pursuing many passions for years.
For example, I had developed a vibrant life story writing program; led retreats and classes in contemplative practices and poetry; facilitated philosophical discussion groups; published three memoirs, including one about existential grief; studied Buddhist death meditation; taught mindfulness meditation to people with chronic stress, pain, illness, and depression; started a private practice in health & wellness coaching and Solution-Focused Brief Therapy, and was employed at a local hospital serving low-income patients and older adults. I have worked with hundreds of people suffering from physical, psychological, and social pain. |
Jay has vision, tremendous energy, and a wry sense of humor. I benefited from his open, welcoming, and accepting style. A deeply energizing and gratifying experience. - D.P., Illinois
For almost three years, I was employed by the Integrative Medicine clinic at Longmont United Hospital as a chronic pain self-management coach, educator, and psychotherapist. In 2018, I had just been awarded a $46,250 grant to fund an innovative new clinical research study that I had designed for opioid users when, tragically, my daughter killed herself. And my whole life went off the rails.
In the aftermath of Beth's suicide, I was forced to reevaluate everything from the ground up. I had to decide what to keep, what to let go, and what, if anything, would make life worth living again. Due in part to the demands of grief, I resigned from the hospital, took time to heal and returned to private practice until the COVID-19 lockdowns of 2020. Recently, after a two-year sabbatical to research and write a book about Beth's life and death, I restarted my practice, specializing in suicide grief. |
Jay is such an intelligent, kind, and insightful soul. Every time I speak with him, I learn something new and interesting about myself. - A.P., Alaska
TODAY, I'M FOCUSED PRIMARILY on supporting parents who have lost a child (of any age) to suicide, although I'm happy to work with any suicide loss survivors.
I have a keen interest in the challenges faced by men and fathers, in particular, for whom few dedicated resources exist at present. Men often don't feel entirely comfortable either in mixed groups with women, or working with female counselors or therapists. Men may grieve in quite different ways than women. Few of us have been socialized to emote or express ourselves like women. Often, there's no safe place to explore the excruciating reality of this sort of loss. Sometimes, men just need the company of other men. Especially those who have endured a similar tragedy.
Despite my training, education and expertise, I am first and foremost a dad who lost his beloved daughter to suicide.
I have a keen interest in the challenges faced by men and fathers, in particular, for whom few dedicated resources exist at present. Men often don't feel entirely comfortable either in mixed groups with women, or working with female counselors or therapists. Men may grieve in quite different ways than women. Few of us have been socialized to emote or express ourselves like women. Often, there's no safe place to explore the excruciating reality of this sort of loss. Sometimes, men just need the company of other men. Especially those who have endured a similar tragedy.
Despite my training, education and expertise, I am first and foremost a dad who lost his beloved daughter to suicide.
You have given me comfort, strength and peace because you have suffered the same loss that I have. - H.B., Michigan
MY UNIQUE APPROACH TO GRIEF RECOVERY draws upon both my personal experience of suicide loss and years of work as a pain self-management specialist, meditation teacher, solution-focused coach and therapist. Suicide grief is an intense, often traumatic form of social pain that utilizes much the same neural circuitry as somatic pain. Healing, therefore, must mobilize many of the same biological, psychological, and social strategies required to endure and live with a chronic medical condition.
Below are eight key areas of knowledge and skill that I bring to this work. The smaller circles represent theoretical, scientific areas of relevance to understanding and integrating suicide grief and loss; the larger circles represent practical methods and models of working with the pain of bereavement. Of course, I'd be happy to explain them further, if you're interested in working with me. Just ask.
Below are eight key areas of knowledge and skill that I bring to this work. The smaller circles represent theoretical, scientific areas of relevance to understanding and integrating suicide grief and loss; the larger circles represent practical methods and models of working with the pain of bereavement. Of course, I'd be happy to explain them further, if you're interested in working with me. Just ask.
Selected Credentials
Licensing & Certifications
|
Professional Trainings
|
Graduate Education
|
NOTE: I am a member of the American Association of Suicidology (AAS), the Suicide Prevention Coalition of Colorado (SPCC), the National Association of Poetry Therapy (NAPT), the Solution-Focused Brief Therapy Association (SFBTA), and the Open Path Psychotherapy Collective. For more about my unusual background, education and experience, visit my LinkedIn profile:
Selected Publications & Presentations
Valusek, J.E. "The Why Question: Making Sense of Suicide," keynote presentation at the Annual Memorial Ceremony for suicide loss survivors, SpeakUp ReachOut, Eagle County, CO, World Suicide Prevention Day, September 10, 2023.
Valusek, J.E. "The Why Question & the Healing Power of Narrative," presentation at the Suicide Prevention Coalition of Colorado (SPCC) Bridging the Divide Conference, Colorado Mountain College, Glenwood Springs, CO, May 18, 2023.
Valusek, J.E., Girl of Light & Shadow: A Memoir of My Daughter, Who Killed Herself. Light, Cloud & Darkness Books (2022).
Valusek, J.E., "Solution-Focused Chronic Pain Self-Management Education: A Pilot Study," Journal of Solution-Focused Practices, July 1, 2021.
Valusek, J.E., "Solution-Focused Chronic Pain Self-Management: A Biopsychosocial Alternative to Opioids," presentation at Solution-Focused Brief Therapy Association (SFBTA) Conference, Boulder, CO, November 9, 2018.
Valusek, J.E., "A Change in Focus: Self-Management of Chronic Illness," keynote presentation at Lymphedema Awareness Day, Longmont United Hospital, Longmont, CO, March 3, 2018.
Valusek, J.E. "Can There Be Spiritual Direction Without God?" Presence: An International Journal of Spiritual Direction, Dec. 1, 2014.
Valusek, J.E., "Is Informal Meditation Sufficient to Cultivate Mindfulness in Daily Life?", research study submitted to Mindfulness Journal, January 10, 2013.
Valusek, J.E., The Secret Sorrow: A Memoir of Mourning the Death of God. iUniverse (2010).
Valusek, J.E. "Leave Me Alone", "The Molten Core", and "Penetrating Every Cell", poems, Tiferet Journal, Issue 4 (2006).
Valusek, J.E. "My God is Dark: A Half Century of Apophatic Chapters," Tiferet: A Journal of Spiritual Literature, Issue 3 (2005).
Valusek, J.E., Museum of Voices: An Autobiographical Miscellany. iUniverse (2004).
Valusek, J.E. Songs of Sacred Union: The Poetry of St. Symeon, the New Theologian, rendered into modern English. Light, Cloud & Darkness Books (2003).
Laucik, S.A. (pseudonym), Darkness & Dreams: A Spiritual Journey Through Separation and Divorce. iUniverse (2000).
Valusek, J.E. "The Why Question & the Healing Power of Narrative," presentation at the Suicide Prevention Coalition of Colorado (SPCC) Bridging the Divide Conference, Colorado Mountain College, Glenwood Springs, CO, May 18, 2023.
Valusek, J.E., Girl of Light & Shadow: A Memoir of My Daughter, Who Killed Herself. Light, Cloud & Darkness Books (2022).
Valusek, J.E., "Solution-Focused Chronic Pain Self-Management Education: A Pilot Study," Journal of Solution-Focused Practices, July 1, 2021.
Valusek, J.E., "Solution-Focused Chronic Pain Self-Management: A Biopsychosocial Alternative to Opioids," presentation at Solution-Focused Brief Therapy Association (SFBTA) Conference, Boulder, CO, November 9, 2018.
Valusek, J.E., "A Change in Focus: Self-Management of Chronic Illness," keynote presentation at Lymphedema Awareness Day, Longmont United Hospital, Longmont, CO, March 3, 2018.
Valusek, J.E. "Can There Be Spiritual Direction Without God?" Presence: An International Journal of Spiritual Direction, Dec. 1, 2014.
Valusek, J.E., "Is Informal Meditation Sufficient to Cultivate Mindfulness in Daily Life?", research study submitted to Mindfulness Journal, January 10, 2013.
Valusek, J.E., The Secret Sorrow: A Memoir of Mourning the Death of God. iUniverse (2010).
Valusek, J.E. "Leave Me Alone", "The Molten Core", and "Penetrating Every Cell", poems, Tiferet Journal, Issue 4 (2006).
Valusek, J.E. "My God is Dark: A Half Century of Apophatic Chapters," Tiferet: A Journal of Spiritual Literature, Issue 3 (2005).
Valusek, J.E., Museum of Voices: An Autobiographical Miscellany. iUniverse (2004).
Valusek, J.E. Songs of Sacred Union: The Poetry of St. Symeon, the New Theologian, rendered into modern English. Light, Cloud & Darkness Books (2003).
Laucik, S.A. (pseudonym), Darkness & Dreams: A Spiritual Journey Through Separation and Divorce. iUniverse (2000).